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Friday, January 1, 2010

Equip yourself with God's word (I'm glad I did!)


I have observed that I am a better person - more in control of myself, more free and more positive - when I study God's word every day. I got away from my daily studies when life happened and I neglected to make studying a priority. I really started to spiral downward. I had two sleeping children yesterday afternoon, so I sat down right away to get back on track. I started by reading my daily scripture and prayer for our country (part of a 40-day prayer challenge). Then I completed my study on Eve. (Thank you again, Jen, for getting me involved in that study!) My Eve study led me to explore the Word a bit more, sending me on a scriptural path through Ephesians and I Thessalonians. I completed my study, put away my books and moved on with life as both kids woke up just as I completed. (I thanked God for giving me the time to study. He knew I needed it!) I didn't think much more about my studies, other than being grateful for the 180-degree turn my day and my attitude took after my time of renewal.

Today I was on an emotional roller coaster. Mikey started nursing again last night and this morning but then completely refused this afternoon. The experience makes me feel so disheartened and is so trying. I know God won't give me more than I can handle, but that doesn't mean He doesn't challenge me! I was telling Mike how hard it is on me - the emotions, the hormones, the lack of sleep. I told him how I "knew" the nursing wouldn't last, but I talked myself out of the negativity and into hoping it would. I further explained that I never used to allow myself to hope because I "knew" I'd be disappointed, and I'd rather be pleasantly surprised. I said all this with quite the tone of vexation. Immediately, a verse popped into my head: "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11). That was part of today's daily scripture from my 40-day prayer challenge. I was humbled. A couple of minutes later I pursued my self-pitying diatribe with more talk of how disheartened I was. As soon as I said the word "disheartening," another verse popped into my head: "And he told them a parable, to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart" (Luke 18:1). Mind you, this particular verse was a memory verse from a few weeks ago. (I guess I memorized it!) I laughed. I couldn't believe how right God was (well, duh!) when he told us to equip ourselves with His word (put on the armor of God, Ephesians 6:10-18), part of my study tangent yesterday. I told Mike about this. Even though I felt he might not appreciate the situation, I knew I couldn't keep it to myself. I have to admit feeling a little guilty, though. Here I was not only distrusting God's goodness but expressing that distrust to another person (though not quite in those words)! I prayed for God's help with that and thanked Him for His goodness. He put it on my heart not only to study His word but to study those particular words these last few weeks. He IS good. I learned an important lesson today:

He loves me so much that I always have hope, so I ought always to pray and not lose heart.

By the way, I have committed to a challenge issued by a fellow facebooker, Rev. Mark Brown. The challenge is to constantly seek God in 2010, committing to an hour of study each day. Rev. Brown provides a scripture a day and insights as the Spirit moves him. To sign up for the challenge or simply follow along, go to Rev. Brown's blog at http://journeydeeperin2godsword.wordpress.com/. I know today, more than ever, how very important constant exposure to God's word is. As Ray Comfort of Way of the Master says, you feed your body with food every day; isn't it just as important to feed your heart and mind with the Word?

2 comments:

  1. I am so sorry that the nursing is not going so well for you :( I totally know how you feel because I had problems nursing my daughter. I ended up pumping for six months because we never could get back to nursing.

    I like the chalenge that you are going to do :) My personal chalenge this year is to read through the whole bible as I have come close but have never done. I have a one year bible that I plan to use for this purpose

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  2. Excellent blog Katie! Looking forward to sharing the challenge with you!

    Mark Brown

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