Many parents worry that they won't love their second child as much as their first. I can't say that I had the worry, but I can say that I understand how they might come to have that worry. The birth of your first child is something you can't understand until you've gone through it. Trust me; I've been on both the giving and receiving end of the you-can't-imagine-how-wonderful-it-is talk. You just can't believe that a) you can handle that kind of emotion again and b) it could ever be as wonderful and amazing. Still, and maybe it's because of my trust in God, I merely wondered how this miracle of loving your second child happens. I never doubted that it would.
Other, experienced parents say that your heart just grows bigger with each child. While I agree that your heart does grow bigger with each child, I have to add that that growth is exponential. I, far and away, love both my children more now that Mikey has come along. It would seem that I've learned to appreciate motherhood so much that I appreciate my children more, which makes my love that much greater.
I was very excited to have this revelation today, especially when I thought back over the last month, this first month as a mother of two. I have had SO MUCH FUN with my daughter. My creativity has gone through the roof. My ability to just play without inhibition has gone through the roof. (And many of you know I'm NOT a shy, inhibited person, so just try to imagine me truly uninhibited...) My old pastimes have bubbled up to the surface. (Color with crayons, anyone?) I have never known such happiness. I have to remind myself over and over how wonderful the afterlife will be because sometimes I never want to leave my earthly motherhood!
I have no doubt that I will have plenty of time and love for however many children God sees fit to give me. The trick is simply to allow the love to happen. Sure, it's overwhelming. Oh, man, is it overwhelming! It is a rush that you could never find on this earth. It changes you. If you allow that love to happen, to wash over you and through you and enlarge your heart and open your mind, you will know, at least I believe, the next best thing to eternity with Jesus. I believe that God gives us this gift of loving one another so that we will be even more excited about loving Him!